December 2009
65 posts
No sarcasm whatsoever
Random guy: Are you Mallory?
Me: Yes, hi!
Random guy: Are you friends with Reni Lane?
Me: Yeah, she's one of my really good friends, actually. How did you know that?
Random guy: I saw you on her Top 8 on Myspace
November 2009
51 posts
“I want to rip off your logic and make passionate sense to you.”
Ch-ch-ch-changes
On being omniscient: Got jeepered creepered and removed the tracker.
On being psychic: Now I don’t have to guess who’s trying to get a hold of me because I can receive/make calls again on my phone.
On teleportation: Heading to airport now to fly back to NYC
“In a couple years people will look back and realize, ‘Man, he was really...”
– Peter Berkman (is holding a meeting in my living room right now)
Fun phone jokes you can make with your friends.
Ashley: I thought it was just a big crowded party.
Me: Nah, now there's some weird instrumental happenings and an asian shouting "Obama"
Ashley:
Me: But this one was a man
Ashley: hahaha
Me:
Ashley:
Me: (that one was a vagina-- you can insert whatever you want.)
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Everyone's favorite pornstar Sasha Grey and I are... →
For six hours. Along with Tony Conrad, seven other people way more interesting than I am, and a gamelan ensemble. While it may not be as hot as her other performances, it sure will be a lot weirder. So if you’ve ever wanted to see Sasha Grey in something longer than 30 minutes or me as a gun-weilding, drug-loving seductress (oh, you have for some time now? great!) then come to the New...
Mamihlapinatapai →
Mamihlapinatapai is a word from the Yaghan language of Tierra del Fuego, listed in The Guinness Book of World Records as the “most succinct word”, and is considered one of the hardest words to translate. It describes “a look shared by two people with each wishing that the other will initiate something that both desire but which neither one wants to start.”
From bestofwikipedia
You've Got Mail
I think Justin and Marissa just cast Patrick and Camille’s e-lationship into the fiery flames of “OFN”
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No More Long Years - Matt & Kim
Anthem
“Every time I comb my hair thoughts of you get in my eyes”
– Prince (via fatalistichues) (via quote-book)
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“Oh so youre single now? Because I will Dennis Rodman the shit out of you. All I...”
– Charlie
Yes, I keep them in a doggy bag.
Charlie: I used to take dog pills to clear up my face.
Me: I take birth control
Charlie: For dogs?
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“I was at dinner with Brad Neely, my celebrity crush, and I was so nervous that I...”
– My friend.
Dakota Fanning is
an avid reader, and includes among her hobbies knitting, swimming, piano, violin, ballet, and horseback riding.
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"Trunk-aided" Conversation
Me: If it's not about elephants it's ireelephant
Jesse: The most powerful weapon we have is the elephant of surprise
SET AND THE CITY:
FREUD’S INFLUENCE ON THE PSYCHOANALYTIC CONNOTATIONS OF THE CINEMATIC SETTING
You see what I did there with that pun? Yknow, it’s Freudian, so I might as well be saying Sex and the City anyways, amirite? Ok, whatever, I think I’m ok at coming up with paper titles.
“Yo. I’m at dinner with Asher Roth right now and we got apple pie a la...”
– so in luv
"haven't you heard, nerd?"
Guy who sits down next to me at a house party: Hey, I'm Edan.
Me: No shit! Edan! There's a rapper I really like with that name!
Edan: That's me.
Me: Oh no, this guy's famous.
Edan: Yeah. I think you're talking about me.
“Among Dreams” Ariel Pink’s...
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Does She Love You?
Question: How do I know if a girl loves me or not?
Answer: If one night you go out drinking and end up back at her place, pass out together on the bed with your shoes on, and wake up a few hours later only to discover that you’ve peed the bed, which she takes in stride, changes the sheets, and then the next morning has a laugh about it, later leaves some pamphlets from the local health clinic about child bedwetters in your mailbox, and eventually after a few weeks tells your friends but never, ever tells hers: She loves you.
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“I wanna fuck up the difference between tai chi and chai tea and end up drinking...”
– Derrick Brown
“You know what your problem is, Miss Whoever-You-Are? You’re chicken, you’ve got...”
– Breakfast at Tiffany’s (via quote-book)
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In which the Bowery Electric gets turned into...
Me: I cant get to the bar- it's futile.
Parker: They've got a feudal system over there?
Me: Yeah, it's hard to get serf'ed.
New times
Robin: All the new buildings here are made of styrofoam
Me: It's a softer world
Robin: No, its a flimsy, cheap world that falls apart at the first sign of danger
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biological clocks
Nick: You realize all of your friends are older. Why is that?
Me: I guess. I dont know- Ive worked a lot more than most people my age, been in "the real world" a little bit longer?
Nick: Who do you think is more mature- me or you?
Me: you.
Nick: Probably me because I gave you a rasberry on your stomach earlier.
youngmanhattanite: Susan Sarandon - “Touch-A,...
Takers?
Rachel: Mallory, at our 10 year reunion I know I'm going to show up with a small, questionably gay Jewish guy
Me: Me too
Rachel: Yes but you're small and Jewish. I'm a 5'million'' aryan who likes the rich, jewish, I-was-a-really-big-loser-in-high school look on a boy
My favorite eat-spot, Lovely Day, reopened! →
Happy days are here again.
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Bon Iver, “Skinny Love”
Been singing...
